Dr. Liew : “Ah Soh, tell me what you don’t like about yourself.”

Ah Soh : “???”

Dr. Liew : “Ooops! I mean… You tolok salah (What’s wrong with you)?”

Ah Soh : “You check lor…”

Dr. Liew : “I see… Please go behind the curtain there and take off all your clothes, including bras and underwears. I’ll be with you in a minute. Nurse! Give her a hand. Pull out tampon and yi-ma-gun if any.”

Ah Soh : “But but but… Need meh?”

Dr. Liew : “You asked me to check mar… So I better be thorough lor…”

Ah Soh : “Actually I come to you because my legs swollen only…”

Dr. Liew : “Alamak! Since when?”

Ah Soh : “Long time liao lor… The sinseh I have been frequenting all these while told me I am out of his hand and I need to seek alternative medicine. That’s why I come to you.”

Dr. Liew : “Me??? Alternative medicine??? WTF???”

Ah Soh : “You want to treat me or not?”

Dr. Liew : “Want want want! Don’t run away!”

After some physicals and tests…

Dr. Liew : “I’m sorry to tell you that you have hypertension, diabetes, rheumatism, probably having heart failure and I can’t be too sure that your kidneys are holding…”

Ah Soh : “But I only have swollen legs! And my doctor (sinseh) said it’s only some wind!”

Dr. Liew : *pengsan*

Later…

RPCNs : “Please, doc! Refrain yourself! That sinseh has family! If you kill him, his kids will be orphans! And his wife would need to masturbate every night!!!”

Dr. Liew : “But I’m only going to carve another asshole on him with my blow torch!”

RPCNs : “It’s not worth it, doc! Give us your hands, your nails still need to be filed…”

Dr. Liew : “Errr… Okay… Spare me the clear paint this time. I don’t like the acetone smell…”