The other night I heard on the radio a female DJ receiving calls and texts from the audience pertaining to the title above.

There was one caller that spoke for quite a long time on air and started getting all emo about it. Apparently he’s been dumped by his girlfriend because he is not ‘bad’ enough, but he denied it though. The DJ had to remind him repeatedly not to get too emotional over the air or she would need to disconnect him.

At first he was talking about how he was surprised that most of the girls that he knows, especially those with pretty face and hot body, invariably will fall for guys with bad attitude, guys that smoke, drink, swear a lot, fight a lot and especially guys that wallop their girl friends. Whereas those goody goody momma’s boys can only watch from far far away and wipe drool.

He also expressed that he doesn’t understand why some of them girls with pretty face and hot body will fall for fat fucks, to which the DJ interjected and told him to stay on topic. The topic was about bad boys and not fat fucks.

He then proceeded to tell the audience that according to his observation, most if not all of the girls with pretty face and hot body that he knows, will invariably get fucked, screwed, raped and dumped by the roadside like rubbish, only to get picked up by another bad guy and get fucked, screwed, raped and dumped like rubbish, all over again. And the process repeats.

The DJ then told him not all girls are like that and tried to talk to him. But he insisted that he be let to finish his speech. After some reminders from the DJ, he continued.

Next he tried to remind the girls out there that bad guys are not dependable. Eventually, a girl will grow up, get married and form her own family. And it’s the best bet if they do so with a goody goody momma’s boy in order to have a happy and stable family, bear and raise healthy children. But before they realise that, their market worth would have hit the rock bottom after getting fucked, screwed, raped and dumped by the roadside like rubbish so many times. I think he almost cried because his voice were trembling.

Then came the commercials while I filled another mug of Stella Artois from the tap.

After the commercials, the DJ started receiving phone calls again.

This time, no more Ah Kua goody goody momma’s boy called up, perhaps they have all gone to sleep as it was already 11.30pm. Instead, a bunch of self-proclaimed gangsters, tailous, taikors, clubbers called up to relate their side of the stories. All of them guys and no girl.

OMFG! The carnage! I sincerely hope that the goody goody momma’s boy had switched off the radio and gone to sleep. The DJ had to cut every single call short.

This post is getting too long and I will not go into what those bad guys had said. I’m sure if you are bad enough, you already know the answer. And if you are a goody goody momma’s boy, it’s best that you remain ignorant.