龍捲風

谷, gu³, means ‘valley’ in Mandarin. But that’s not the meaning I want to teach you today. What I’m going to teach you today, is its Cantonese usage.

In Cantonese, 谷 is pronounced as ‘gook’, and can carry another meaning other than ‘valley’, which is ‘to strain’.

To fully understand the essence of the word ‘谷’, you’ll need to understand what is Valsalva Manoeuvre – expiratory effort against a closed glottis, which increases pressure within the thoracic cavity, like straining for stool.

I’m going to give you some examples of its daily usage.

1. 谷屎 – gook si. Straining for stool.
   “Ah boy, why you hide inside toilet so long?”
   “Gook si ah ma…”
2. 谷氣 – gook hei. Frustration.
   “Why her face like die mother like that?”
   “She kena bullied, now in the middle of gook hei.”
3. 暗谷 – um gook. To strain privately, or, to blame no one but self.
   “I told him not to buy that Canon 350D. Now that its price has dropped by 600 ringgit within a few weeks, he um gook lor…”
   or
   “I told you never to record that stupid video of yours with your handphone. Now it’s all over the internet! Um gook!”
4. 谷到盡 – gook dou joon. Strain with utmost effort.
   “Wah, you buy so many condoms, tonight you and your prom date gook dou joon ar?”
5. 猛谷 – mang gook. Strain forcefully.
   “Look at the smoke that came out from Paul’s car. He must have floored the accelerator, mang gook!”
6. 谷爆 – gook bao. Strain until rupture.
   “Take life easily. This also you angry, that also you angry… One day you’re going to gook bao ji chong (piles).”
7. 死谷 – sei gook. Strain till death.
   “Last time you so big size, I sei gook also you dowan to come out. The doctor boh pian (no choice), had to cut me up lor, sooi zhai (naughty boy)!”
8. 谷精上腦 – gook jing xiong nou. Strain until sperm goes up the brain, denotes behaving stupidly secondary to prolonged abstinence.
   “Eversince your girlfriend ditched you, you’ve been crashing into every available Nescafe signboard. You gook jing xiong nou ar?”
9. 谷到走火 – gook dou jao foh. Strain until misfire, as in fecal incontinence or in some cases, wet dream.
   “Come follow me to zhar kuat (massage) destress lar… Everyday work work work, later gook dou jao foh.”
   or
   “What are you doing in the middle of the night washing your underwear?”
   “Haih… These days so many exams, I tfk also no time… Mar gook dou jao foh lor…”
10. 谷極都谷唔出 – gook gik dou gook mm choot. Straining to the extreme still can’t strain it out.
    “Dai lou (boss), today we go sao sou (demand debt payment) time, that Ah Liong gook gik dou gook mm choot. So we beat him up. Unfortunately, he died.”
    “Don’t worry. Tonight I arrange you go Hup Zai (Haadyai) jiok chou (exile).”

That’s all for today. Class dismiss!